Katarzyna Szkarpetowska: You told me that you started to distance yourself from God already in elementary school. The interest in spirituality, as you said, came back with force when you were seventeen. What made it happen?
Arkadiusz Łodziewski: I was in a gastronomic high school then. Catechesis was taught to us by a priest in his old age, now a saint of memory. He wore a patched cassock and commuted to school on an old bicycle. When he was teaching catechesis, unfortunately, all the students disturbed him, including me.
He couldn't maintain discipline, he couldn't get our attention. He was indecisive, unassertive. I guess that's why everyone went after him. And even though we weren't some spoiled youth, he couldn't teach these lessons. Today I know that the evil spirit was strong at that time, which neither I nor my colleagues were aware of.
After a few months, the aged priest was replaced by another priest - young, energetic, cheerful. I remember that in the first lesson he said: "We will not pray and talk about God." This caused silence, disbelief and shock in the classroom. He knew how to approach us and led us to God in a way known to Him and Him.
For example, for half an hour of class, he talked to us about food, about cooking, and then for fifteen minutes he led us to the Lord Jesus. He knew how to win us over to heaven and that's what I learned from him - that no theology will help if we don't win the heart of man first. The new priest organized a trip to Częstochowa. The whole class went. I'm ashamed to admit it, but my friends and I came up with something very stupid, namely we came up with the idea to go to the painting of the Mother of God and swear there. We wanted to check, we don't know why, if it's possible. In addition, we made a bet on which of us would do it best.
I know it was very thoughtless of us, and certainly under the influence of an evil spirit. What happened next affected practically my entire life. I knelt before the image of Our Lady and wanted to curse, but some force prevented me from uttering a single word. It left me speechless.
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I couldn't even talk to my friends. I was terrified and ran away from the painting, mentally begging God to give me back my voice. I remember that I stood at the box with intentions to the Mother of God and wrote: "Mary, please, convert me, but specifically." I regained my speech after a few minutes.
After returning from the pilgrimage, for two weeks, I went to church every day - I just felt such a desire. Then came camping, wine, girls, bonfires, and I was back in a state of unconsciousness again.
I just woke up eight years ago. I met the living Lord Jesus. I felt joy that came from outside, from God. It did not sprout in my heart, but was poured into it by God. I heard simple, loving words: “I love you. Just like that."
Such - or what?
Broken, battered.
What were you hurt at that time?
Unfulfilled relationship, unrealized dreams, life away from the sacraments. Before my conversion , I was striving for existence, for material goods, I enjoyed respect, which was only a game of appearances. I had the satisfaction of having things that were a mock-up in my life.
All my friends that I had who were friends just because they had some interest in it, they left. New people appeared - in a way more real people.
Before my conversion, one of my greatest joys was the sports car I bought. When I met the Lord Jesus, I couldn't believe at all that I was concentrating on such crap. That I made something so insignificant so important in my life.
Do you enjoy sharing God's love with others, with people you don't even know?
For me, there is no greater joy on this planet than sharing God's love with others.
I'm asking because most of the time you don't know the people you preach the Good News to. You meet them for a while, your paths will most likely never cross again.
Here on earth, perhaps not, but they will most certainly intersect in heaven. These people are my sisters and brothers in faith, and I will spend all eternity with them. Someday, when we sit with Jesus on the grass in heaven, we will remember our earthly life and the moment when we first looked at the sky with our hearts.
Have you met people in your life who already radiated holiness here on earth?
I met. One of such people was Maria Chmura - a holy woman of God. When I met her, she was about ninety years old. We became friends, although I never thought I could be friends with a ninety-year-old woman. She had a face like a fairy-tale grandmother.
I went to the meetings of the Renewal in the Holy Spirit community, which she also attended. She was always behind. I met her every day in the Gorzow cathedral, where she used to go to Mass. I thought it would be nice to talk to her sometime. I felt that this is not an ordinary woman.
And one day, when she was coming back from church, I talked to her. She stopped and we sat on the wall. I remember it was raining and the wall was wet, but it didn't matter to her. I suggested that we hide from the rain in a nearby gate, and she, with a smile on her face, asked, "What, are you afraid of the rain?"
I asked what his name was. She said Maria. "Oh, it's just like our Mummy. And by name?" "My name is Cloud." It moved me somehow. She smiled. "Maria Cloud, really?". "Yeah," she confirmed with a smile on her face.
And she began to tell ... that she used to live in Krakow. That she knew Karol Wojtyła very well, sang in the choir he supervised, went kayaking with him. I thought, "God, what a treasure there is in the community and no one knows about it." We became friends, and I often walked her home after church.
Mrs. Maria received Holy Communion twice every day, that was her desire. We went to a community meeting together once. It was on the day when Mrs. Maria had already received Holy Communion twice. Holy Mass was celebrated during the community meeting. Mrs. Maria, as she had previously received Communion twice, could not go to her, because you know - you can receive Jesus twice in one day.
I suggested: "Mrs. Maria, I will ask the priest and maybe you will let me receive Communion for the third time." She was a little confused but didn't say no. And there was a moment during the mass when I could approach the priest and discreetly ask him this question. He thought for a moment and agreed. I came back to Mrs. Maria, so happy, and I say: "I arranged it, you can take it for the third time."
And then something happened that I didn't expect. Maria said, "Who are you? You didn't do it! That's what Jesus did." I sat next to her and said, "Lord, I'm not talking anymore" ( laughs ). When she returned after communion, I hugged her and she said: “For the first time in my ninety years of life, I received the Lord Jesus in Communion for the third time in one day. Thank you". A few weeks later, Maria died.
An excerpt from the book "My base is in heaven. A. Łodziewski in conversation with K. Szkarpetowska”, pub. Salvator.
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